How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

Whatever.

My 11 million SEK, Dr Jo.

"Hey guys, AI is pretty big so let's centre our prizes on it this year. We can get some attention, and it's all about advertising, at the end of the day, isn't it?"

Why are white women so hard to date?

[The basic structure of artificial neural networks] has close similarities with spin models in statistical physics applied to magnetism or alloy theory. This year’s Nobel Prize in Physics recognizes research exploiting this connection to make breakthrough methodological advances in the field of ANN.

(Bob Dylan, Nobel Prize for Literature, 2016)

[Older voice] "Mmm. What about Hinton, he's widely regarded? Nobody got fired for buying IBM"

Why did Donald Trump and Melania Trump sleep in different rooms?

There you go.^†

"Where can we shoehorn it in? Chemistry is easy 'cos AlphaFold; but what about physics? A bit more challenging, right?"

… then anything is possible. There’s no rule that a Nobel Prize has to make sense.^*

Why is my vagina swollen, it’s very itchy. I had sex we used protection, but day after it felt like my insides had a heartbeat as well as itching, the pulsing has went away but it is still itchy and my discharge is yellow, i'm 15, what could it be?

Why wait any longer for the one you love?

"Good point, I'm sure we can swing it. And let's tack on Hopfield while we're about it."

[Younger voice] "But wait a minute, Ising-Lenz goes back to the 1920's. And didn't Hinton plagiarise rather a lot? He also didn't invent modern backprop, did he, that's Linnainmaa? And Amari preceded Hopfield, too. That's not a good look."

What can help me fall asleep at night?

A fly on the wall at the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences

^† They rationalise their decision thusly:

"Good idea, but how can we wangle something that says 'Physics'?"

Would you let your son wear leggings to school?

Why wait any longer for the world to begin?

(Mumbles of assent)

^* Fibiger got the 1926 Medicine prize for the discovery of Spiroptera carcinoma (Don’t ask).

How is bestiality wrong, but killing animals for sport or trophies is considered okay?

You can have your cake and eat it too

In awarding prizes, the Nobel Committees often seem only marginally more competent than MTG is at explaining meteorology. And if they can give a literature prize for lyrics like:

They then move on to selectively provide their own version of history. But hey, it’s OK. They wanted controversy, didn’t they? Whatever.

Jenny from Perth writes – my partner is the life of the party, women and men adore him. But at home, he gets angry at us for the silliest reasons and never nice words me or our kids, always putting us down. Should I stay or leave him?

Fortunately, we are privy to the discussion that led up to this:

"Naah, Linnainmaa is a Finn. Can't give it to a bloody Finnish mathematician. Let's go for drinks. Brännvin anyone?"

"Didn't he do something with Boltzmann in it? That sounds physics-y. RBMs and stuff, eh?"

Is there a musician who has publicly stated that they do not want their music played by the Trump campaign or at a Trump rally? If so, who and why?

When he's standing, in front of you

In December 1973, when Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, comedian Tom Lehrer dropped his mic and stamped on it—satire had just died.

Whatever.

What measures do celebrities take to protect their images from being used for commercial purposes without permission? How much does this typically cost them?